“GC traces include an anomalous peak, but that's likely because a postdoc has been using a hot plate in lab to fry bacon”
“The Eppendorf tubes were ‘shaken like a polaroid picture’ until that part of the song ended.”
“Since the mass spec was in use, I assumed that my product had been formed and proceeded to try to purify it.”
“The HPLC method was optimized to hide the impurity peak under the main product peak in order to meet >98% purity spec.”
“We keep that novelty magnet on the side of the mass spec because if we remove it nothing works. No idea why.”
“HPLC-MS analysis was not performed because nobody knows how to make the expensive new instrument work.”
“The constant mass peak on ms/ms is attributed to volatiles present while the institute's hallways were being painted.”
“HPLC methodology cannot be replicated because the 30 year old pump broke and parts don't exist. Sample looks right anyway.”
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